Better days always come.

Gloomy days seem unending at times. It becomes difficult to see beyond what we are currently experiencing. These are times when it looks like the world is caving in on us and everything is not going as planned. You curse at yourself, punch walls, and take it out on other people. Some people kick it up a notch to a point where they give up on life and kill themselves.

If only we would be a little bit more patient, if only we can fight a little harder, if only we see a little clearer, if only we can believe a little stronger. Little efforts and push can and will get us to where we need to be. Unfortunately, we make the mistake of getting caught up in the present and we fail to see the future. What you need to do instead of sobbing in that problem or situation is to make something out of it because at that moment, you are writing your success story. Make every line and chapter worth it.  Bad days last longer than they should when we submit to it more than we should. Own your days, set your goals, and make yourself happy. Finally, above all, believe in yourself and think positively because better days are closer than you think.

Children being molested by relatives

Has there been any adult who touched you, your friend, or siblings inappropriately at a younger age? These days, sexual molestation occur from father to daughter or son, brother to sister, teacher to students, and babysitters to children. Isn’t it daunting that people who are expected to be custodians of our children are the culprits taking advantage of them? Should it be so difficult to leave your child with your siblings or close acquaintances?

Children are vulnerable and susceptible to abuse. It is disheartening to find that a lot of children predators are people close to the families. In a perfect world, you can have family members, friends, and teachers watch your kids while you’re away without problems. Unfortunately, in this perverse world, only a few can be trusted. Child molestation has become a predominant form of abuse which some parents remain ignorant towards. A recent National Child Abuse Statistics report indicates that, more than 90% of juvenile sexual abuse victims know their perpetrator in some way. About 80% of 21 year olds that were abused as children met criteria for at least one psychological disorder.

Many parents fail to communicate with their children, and as a result, they are unable to detect the emotional and physical trauma these children are experiencing. In most cases, the perpetrator who is an adult, threaten these children not to tell anyone about their experiences.

Your duty as a parent or guardian:

Educate your kids about their bodies and how to protect it.

Ask them about any discomfort they might  be experiencing in their bodies.

Be mindful of the kinds of people you entrust your children to.

Notice any changes in your child’s behavior around certain people.

It is important that parents take time to ensure the safety of their children in order to prevent future mental health    problems associated with trauma from childhood.


National Child Abuse Statistics

Dating an ex’s friend or a friend’s ex.

Every so often people are caught up in awkward situations where they have to make a decision to hook up with or date a friend’s ex. Is it wrong to date your ex’s friend? There is actually no right or wrong answer but since our world function somewhat on social rules, it might be a problem. So, look at it this way, is it okay for your friend to date your ex? Possible answers are, it depends on,

1.) How close the friends are- Acquaintances don’t  count as friends, therefore, you it is okay to date, if your ex and the potential new date are not close.

2) You- Do you feel like you are betraying someone in this situation.  This will matter for those who have a heart and are considerate.

3) Your Friend- How your friend feels about you dating her ex matter a lot if you plan on keeping that friendship. Talk to him or her about the possibility of dating his or her  ex.

4.) How long they have separated- Life happens sometimes and the hearts intertwine unexpectedly sometimes. If your friend has been separated from this person for more a long time, it might work out but as a form of loyalty, you should tell your friend.

If you want to be compliant with social rule, it is not appropriate to date a close friend’s ex but no one makes your decisions for you.  Also, there might be a possibility that the friend’s ex is your own soul mate, nevertheless, you should be able to tidy up loose ends by respecting your friendship.

Reasons why dating  your friend’s ex might be a challenge,

– You are at risk of jeopardizing your friendship.

-You might not feel comfortable with picturing your friend with your current partner (insecurity)

-It would make you seem like a horrible person

For reality check, always fit yourself into the scenario to determine how you would feel if it were you. Would it be okay for your friend to date your ex.

Related Post: Dating friends’ ex

Is it ok to date a friend’s ex?

When the excitement vanishes

When you get something you are passionate about, your level of excitement sky rockets out of this world. It will seem as if a whole new you has been reformed, but as times goes on, the new experience becomes a part of you. For example, when you start dating a person, you get extremely excited about your newly found love. You  then interpret this excitement as falling in love or being in love. This makes you oblivious to the fact that, the excitement will not always be there; it simmers down with time as you get closer to the person. Problems start when people sense that the excitement no longer exists in their relationship. Complaints such as, “it doesn’t feel the way it used to,” “the relationship was more fun when we started dating” all comes up. Cinderella and Prince Charming didn’t have an all-rosy relationship as we have been led to believe. When you buy something you really like, you will cherish it more than anything within the first three weeks to a month, but  after that, you are not as excited. This doesn’t indicate that you no longer cherish that thing, you have only gotten used to having it in your life.

Love is not just a feeling of excitement, it is a concrete connection  between two hearts. It is beyond the sleepless nights, butterflies in the belly, or romantic acts. It is about adjusting to your partner’s personality (both good and annoying), finding a reason to love that person even when they are not as romantic as they used to be. When you begin feeling this way, learn to sustain your excitement by finding happiness in the little things your partner does. Often times, when the excitement doesn’t seem to exist, the lovers have become very familiar with each other and it shows their relationship is growing. However, you must both work on making each other happy at all times. Communicate your feelings especially when you feel like something is missing. Sometimes partners don’t feel the need to try too hard to impress the other person as the relationship progresses.

You should bear in mind that relationships go through phases and if you expect that a particular phase will last forever, you are setting yourself up for heartaches. When it seems like the excitement vanishes, remind yourself of the love you bear in your heart and appreciate the person you’re with. Each stage of your relationship is an opportunity to learn and grow.

Related Posts:Ways to keep the excitement from fading

Couples committed to Love

May Challenge

As the year gradually slips away, it’s about time to grab hold of every second. Remember the list you had at the beginning of the year, or the to do list you made for every month till now? Bring it all out and highlight what needs to be done this month. Let’s challenge each other by making a plan to achieve those goals.

What is the one thing you have a picture of in your head but scared to bring to life? You’ll never find results if you don’t get started. Take a bold step to start working on it and believe in yourself to achieve good outcome. Spend some time each day to monitor progress and see how far you might have gone by the end of the month.